The one-sided nature of coaching and what you might not know about me...

As a leadership coach, my job is to be your thought partner. To do this I listen deeply - tuning into themes and patterns, the words beneath your words, and the words not spoken. As well as the places and times that you pause or say nothing. I ask questions that I hope will support you inquire more fully into yourself - the roots of your patterns, the different parts of you, the why behind your actions, the core of what motivates you, and the energy behind your feelings.

In a coaching conversation I aim to speak far less that my client. And in between one of us speaking, there's silence - room to pause, reflect, and process. And hopefully jot down a few notes.

In all of this, my clients don't really get to know me - not in the way they might know a friend or a colleague. What I hope they do get is a felt sense of me, one that allows them to confide in me like a trusted friend, and that allows them to do their best and most honest thinking and feeling in our time together.

A recent conversation with a past client reminded me of the one-sided nature of this work. Clients will, understandably, make assumptions about me - sometimes imagining that that I have everything figured out... that I don't wrestle with the same questions they do. But the truth is, I do.

A mentor once told me that as a coach or a therapist, I am either two steps ahead, two steps behind, or right there alongside my clients. We are all navigating what it means to be human. I hold space for others because I deeply believe in the need and the value of having such a space for myself. I need it too.

And so, while my role isn't to share my own struggles with my clients, know this - if you've ever struggled, doubted yourself, felt alone, or questioned your relevance - I have too.